Ema runs to tell her feelings to Subaru. She confessed to him after the basketball match and start to go out. Ema thought that Subaru thinks of her as a younger sister but Subaru thought that Ema likes Natsume. So this time things were cleared.
Subaru went back to Miyazaki..
The time goes by and it’s nearly Christmas.
Ema came home from department store (after university’s class) and met Rui. Then Juli start talking about her going out with Subaru but after all, Juli gave Ema the permission to do as she want. So, Juli and Rui stays happy forever.
Iori came back on 22th December and gave Ema a present (which is a photo frame) for Christmas since he will be busy with work. Before Iori left he ask Kaname if the cross (on Kaname’s chest) erased? Kaname just smiled and Iori smiled back saying, "Have a happy Christmas Kaname-nii-san," before he left.
Fuuto’s leaving for study abroad at America, so he came back to the resident. He left things to be sorted out and went to his room and Ema followed him but got caught. He tries to kiss her but she resisted and says, “Oh, you got a man?” Then she told him that it was Subaru and he says, “Why is Subaru better than me,” and all that hes left with a “you’ll regret going out with him.” Before he can do anything more, Yuusuke came by and helped her.
Yuusuke invited her to eat with him at a cake and they talked. She revelas to him that since high school she decided that if she would date one of the brothers she wanted to have everyone's blessing. She realises that there are people who must be hurt and people who might even be angry with her. She had plans to make an extravagant Christmas feast for everyone to atone for her actions, but she feels there would be people who she hurt who will feel even more hurt to eat her food. She thinks that its a selfish way of her trying to apologise, but that people will actually be more hurt by it. Yuusuke then says he has a request for her: for her to make lots of food for the Christmas party this year. He wants to eat her food, since he's never had Christmas dinner made by her before. Ema realises that in the 3 years she's had Christmas with the Asahina brothers theres never been one occasion where they could all make it. As they decide to leave Yuusuke asks her one final question which is "Do you regret choosing Suba-nii?", he says he doesn't care what the others might think but "anyhow I wish you and Suba-nii for happiness" and that he hopes she believes him.
Yuusuke said it’s getting late we should leave, so they left to their own rooms.
Next day, the Christmas party came, one more hour before the party started Ema was called, and the brothers and Yuusuke want to give her present so he tells her to open the door. When she open the door, Subaru was sitting in the living room. Then goes the talk.
Ema went to fetch something when she met Natsume. He told her that he forgot his apartment key so he came to get them. Ema just goes like wanting to return the key to him but he told her to just keep it as it is. After that Natsume and Subaru met and talk. Natsume left before the twins came.
So at last the twins drinking with Subaru and they ask, "did you know the reason why Ema chose him yet, are you going to go out with her without understand why she chose you?"
Subaru goes to Ema’s room and she told him to sit on the bed so she can get them tea, but Subaru started asking her question. So she answer him, that it’s about the timing because of who she was, not the person who’s so fast but someone who can wait for her but did wait too long either. Then after that Subaru gave her Christmas present, which was a ring with heart stone design. They kiss in the bed and its implied that they have sex.
The last scene is the family having their usual breakfast at the dining room. Its her home, as a family and a lover.
Chapter 38: 忘れられない日になったから[]
[ Because it was a unforgettable day ][]
The cherry blossom petals begin to dance as they fall.
March.
I turn to look back behind me. There, I spot the apartment I had lived in up until now.
(So much has happened…)
"…Chii."
I heard a voice from behind me.
I turn to face it and notice Juli sitting quitely on the road.
"Are you done getting things ready?"
"Yes, I only have this since most of the luggage has been sent already."
I lift up the bag I have in hand.
"Good. Shall we get going then?"
"Juli…"
I walked up beside Juli.
"Are you sure you want to come along? You could stay with Louis-san if you wanted to."
"That’s true."
Juli closes his eyes.
To be honest, Louis’ grooming was perfect so its unfortunate I can’t experience it again.
"If that’s the case…"
"But you know, Chii…"
Juli opens his eyes.
"Since you’ll be alone now, you’ll still have me but, everyone else whom you used to consult upon will be gone. Louis of course, and even Yusuke. You understand that right?"
"Yes…"
That’s why I decided to need to go. I know you’ll still be needing me in the future so I won’t be leaving you.
"Juli…"
—On the day of Christmas Eve, Juli had acceped Subaru for the time being, but it was clear it wasn’t his real intention to.
So I decided that someday I would properly talk to Juli about it.
To talk about about how I came to like Subaru-san, and how long I have liked him.
Still, I continued to advance along with Subaru and myself.
And eventually apologized to Juli for not trusting his instincts.
Juli listened to my story in silence. And finally said,
"I hear what your saying. You should have considered my thoughts on this as well. From now on I won’t maliciously opposite it. I promise that I’ll hear your feelings properly.Since your important to me I want you to know you can always talk to with me about it."
It made me really happy to have him say so. With Juli’s ill feelings gone, I was able to talk things out. It was something I was really eager to be open about to him.
I’ll…I’ll leave the apartment and move out by myself. That is what I decided.
Last summer I considered moving out of the apartment. I went to Papa and Miwa-san for advice.
Back then I wasn’t able to settle down from what happened at the villa on the island. I wanted nothing but to run away from all of it; so I started thinking of leaving the apartment.
But, its different this time.
"How is it different?"
When I talked to him about it, Juli asked me so.
"When I confessed to Subaru, my feelings we’re happily accepted. Now we’re actually dating. However, when I’m living in the apartment with everyone, I think about how Subaru would see it."
"Hmm…he certainly would become more anxious."
"In addition, there are people whom I had already rejected and may still be shaken up over it. Of course that doesn’t mean I don’t still have faith in everyone but, I feel it might be hard to face them if their feelings came out."
"That’s true."
On Christmas morning, I felt slightly uneasy. But I’m sure I wasn’t the only one. I’m sure they were keeping those thoughts to themselves. Especially those who hadn’t been able to accept my feelings.
And on the morning of the same day, I couldn’t forget when Yusuke-kun came out into the living room. It was through their conversations I could feel the brotherly connection between them all. I think it is best I don’t disturb their unbreakable bonds.
'If it becomes hard to come back to their own house because I'm there, then I shouldn't be. Because it's originally their parents home.”
"I’m a doubtful of why it’d be necessary to decide it right then but…
There’s no doubt a problem would arise if you didn’t eventually leave.”
"There’s actually another reason as well…"
"What is it?"
"Actually, it was something Hikaru-san said."
On Christmas morning I encountered Hikaru-san on the elevator hall on the fifth floor. He said,
—I want you to stay in this apartment as it is. That way, lots of interesting things are bound to happen.
"That cross-dresser said such thing?"
"So I started thinking, Is he looking down at me?"
"What?"
"Until now I’ve been…how do I put it? I’ve think I’ve been very passive.
So from now on I won’t let that be the case. I have to think and and act for myself.”
"That’s great! And it’d be thrilling if you could start by breaking that crossdresser’s nose!"
"So, I take it that means you agree as well?"
"…Well yes, I don’t have any reason to object."
Of course I didn’t only consult Juli about it.
There was also Papa, Miwa-san, and Mahoko…
Though some were surprised at first, but they eventually all approved.
Since I made up my mind, I decided to tell every single one of my brothers. I wrote letters to those I couldn’t easily get in contact with.
So now I’m preparing for my new home. And today…I’m leaving this town.
"Juli, from here on out are my best regards for the future."
I bent down and held out my hand. Juli runs up my arm onto my shoulders.
"Likewise."
"…Thank you, Juli."
"By the way Chii, your luggage has probably arrived already…"
"Ah, you’re right. I should hurry then."
Just as I was about to leave…
"Wait a minute!"
I hear a loud voice and a figure dashes out of the apartment.
"Y-Yusuke-kun?!"
"Haa, thank goodness. I made it in time."
Yusuke-kun exhales a long breath.
"If you’re were gonna leave today you should’ve said something."
"But, it should be fine right? Since its the weekday everyone has work today."
"Well, that may be true for everyone else but…I’m still on Spring Break."
Yusuke-kun gives a wry smile.
"With 13 brothers it seems pretty cold that you couldn’t at least let one of them see you off."
"Yusuke-kun…"
"You really are serious about leaving, huh?"
Yusuke slightly glances away.
"Yeah, I’m sorry. But, I think this is for the best."
"Well, I guess you’re right. After you told me about it, I thought about it pretty hard. Until I finally realized…my answer was the same as yours."
Yusuke-kun looks up.
"Besides, just because you’re leaving the house doesn’t mean I’ll never see you again."
"Speaking of which, we can always meet at the University."
"Oh yeah. You’re right."
Yusuke-kun smiles bitterly.
"And its not like we’ll stop being a family."
"Of course not. Everyone in this family is important to me. I’m still a member of the Asahina family, after all."
"Well obviously!"
After saying so he continued.
"…So even if you leave the apartment, we’ll always be family."
"Yusuke-kun…"
The wind becomes strong. Cherry blossom petals begin to wrap around me and Yusuke-kun like snow.
"…Chii, we should probably get going soon."
I hear Juli’s voice in my ear. I give a small nod.
"Sorry, I should probably get going now."
"I understand. Take care of yourself."
"Thank you for everything until now, Yusuke-kun."
Yusuke-kun says nothing and smiles gently. In response, I also smile back. After that, I turn around and begin walking.
I put Juli on my shoulder and begin to pass through the town of Kichijoji.
4 years ago I went to the Asahina’s from the station in a similar manner.
Now I’m leaving from the house and to the station.
"It feels somewhat nostalgic now."
Juli had said.
"Like it was only yesterday when you first arrived in this town."
"It certainly does."
"Yet we’re returning to the original spot now."
"But…it’s different now."
I began.
"It used to be just me and you. And 4 years ago my only family was my papa. However, it’s different now. Because I have Miwa-san and also…
a lot of brothers too.”
"…Hmm."
Juli thinks while folding his arms.
"You’re certainly right about that. Well, while some of them have their own issues, I admit they’re still rightfully your family."
"Thank you, Juli."
I patted Juli’s stomach. Juli smiles happily.
Before long, I was able to see the exit of the arcade.
I cross the signal, then stand with my back to the station.
At that moment, those usual faces appeared in my mind.
Of course it could only be them. The faces of my 13 precious brothers.
Among them all, the first one I met was Wataru-kun.
Innocent and cute; with just a look he could soften your heart.
With enough studies, I’m sure he’ll become a remarkable man in the future.
When I first met Masaomi-san, I mistook him for Wataru’s father.
But, Masaomi-san really did have a father like presence to him.
Not only for Wataru, but for the whole family. I’m sure at times when I wasn’t wary of it, there were times where even he had a hard time. Yet he never let it show, and just watched me gently.
Ukyo taught me ways to cook meat and even helped me with my studies. I also got a lot of important advice from him as well.
Speaking of advice, I have Kaname-san to thank for that as well.
When you get to know all his good and bad sides you really accept him for who he is. I’ve never met such a gentle person.
Iori-san, I think he was a really sad person. He could only do such much while enduring a lot. But, I think he’s been changing gradually. From now on I’ll be encountering him in TV and magazines.
Fuuto-kun…I think he was a bit of a troubled younger brother. But his passion for acting cannot be matched. I hope for his success in America.
Hikaru-san, though kind things were never said, I’ll get him to look back at me. I’ve often thought about it. When that time comes, I’ll look at him with a face full of confidence. It may take some time but I will. Someday.
Louis-san has helped me in various ways. I cannot count the amount of times he gave hope to my heart. I was really happy when he told me he was an adopted child.
Yusuke-kun was the only person I knew before I came to the Asahina family. When I first came to the house, it was very reassuring for me to see him. From then on, he always worried about me a lot. I’ll never forget when he helped me during that joint party. Since I’ll be able to meet him at the University, I will repay his kindness little by little.
Tsubaki-san and Azusa-san…they really make each other whole. Among everyone, I felt I spent the most time with them, so I have a lot of memories together. Although I wasn’t able to answer their feelings, I hope in the future to build a new relation with them as family.
Natsume-san…I feel I troubled Natsume-san the most. He relied on me the most with his feelings but I wasn’t able to accept them. I feel apologetic towards him. In fact, I reported it directly to him
that I was leaving the house. At that time, I returned the key I had kept borrowed from him. I told him that I’ve been thinking that I shouldn’t keep them after all.
Natsume-san responded with, “I see…” and took then took them back.
—I think of the countless memories.
I was able to make so many memories during my time with the Asahinas. There were sad ones, but more than anything pleasant ones.
(Up until now…)
Before I realized it I was bowing my head.
(Thank you)
At that time.
My phone in my bag began to ring. I take it out in a hurry. It was from Subaru-san.
"Hello…? I just now arrived at the station. …I just came through it. When I arrive at the new house, I’ll call you back. Ah, Subaru-san, When you get here can we go together?"
From the otherside of the phone, “Sure, of course.” Subaru-san’s voice was heard.
"Alright, I’m looking forward to it."
I hang up the phone and let out a big breath.
From here on out, my new future awaits me.
(…I’ll do my best)
Again, I swear it to my heart.
"Let’s go, Juli."
I entered the station in Kichijoji.
After #038 – Side Yusuke: ???[]
Tears only the petals know[]
"You want me to return to Tokyo right now?"
Suba-nii gave me surprised stare.
"…That’s right." I responded.
"That’s out of the question. Don’t ask such ridiculous questions. There’s no way I can do that." His voice raised a little.
"I’m aware of how ridiculous it seems. But there’s a reason for it…"
"What is it?"
"It’s about her. She’s become really depressed lately. It’s unbearable to watch her like that. Please, you should come back."
At that time, Suba-nii’s expression changed.
The evening of December 23rd.
The Miyazaki Delight Stars made the prefecture sports center their headquarters.
- - -
"Still, I was surprised to see you so suddenly."
Suba-nii wore a partly surprised face.
"I’m sorry to appear out of the blue. But I wanted to carry out this request somehow."
"I see…"
"I even had you treat me to a meal…"
"Don’t worry about it. Ah, here we are."
With Suba-nii beside me, I enter the apartment that had a nice homey feel to it.
"Wow, so you live here, huh."
"Yeah."
While saying so, Suba-nii opened the automatically lockable door.
"Looking for a hotel is rather hard nowadays. So I’m staying here."
It was 10:00 at night. Unlike Tokyo, it was considerably quiet.
"Although since its only me it’s easy to maintain."
In comparison to our home in Kichijoji, it certainly is small. Though it still had enough room for training equipment.
While thinking so, I speak to Suba-nii.
"You really saved me by letting me stay here. I actually don’t have much money on me."
"Really?"
"I tried to get by with some part-time money, but even if I used it all up I still didn’t have enough to make it there and back. So at the last minute I had to borrow money from Masa-nii. It was pretty bad."
"You really…"
"I know it was reckless of me. And I didn’t think it through very well."
— I’ll bring Suba-nii.
I made that decision last night.
After exchanging words in the cake shop, I thought of ways to encourage her.
In the end, I couldn’t think of anything.
However, while I was troubled with this, one thought came to mind. “If Suba-nii was here…”
(There’s no way to return to Tokyo, is what he said when asked. …No. That’s not right. Suba-nii is the only person who can encourage her now. I’ll have to get him no matter what.)
Fortunately, Suba-nii’s practice team is generally open to the public.
I checked the schedule on the internet and made sure there was practice today. Then I took a plane to Miyazaki so I wouldn’t miss it.
I arrived in Miyazaki early this afternoon.
After I arrived, I headed to the gymnasium. I told the staff team that he was family. After practice, I asked to meet with Suba-nii.
Though as I expected, when I first asked him I was given a frank refusal.
But when I mentioned her situation in detail, he finally accepted.
"Please sit down. I don’t have much, but would you like a drink?"
"Ah, sure. Thank you."
Once I’m given a sports drink, I sit down on the bed that occupies nearly half the room.
On the shelf nearby, I noticed a paper bag that had a pretty fancy look to it.
"Suba-nii, what’s this?"
"Hm? …Oh, that."
Suba-nii picks up the bag.
At that moment, a memo pad dropped on the floor. The number 7 was scribbled on it.
(What’s this?)
"To be honest, I intended to send this yesterday but I couldn’t find the time to do it."
Suba-nii gives a worrisome look.
"But, it turned out fine in the end. Thanks to you, I can give it directly."
"Come again?"
"It’s fine. Don’t worry about it."
Suba-nii sets down the bag, and sits down to face me.
"Anyway, its good that the team members were fine with it."
I take a sip of the sports drink I was given.
"Not exactly. I wouldn’t say that until I’m actually there.."
Suba-nii said so bitterly.
"You really surprised everyone. Because you said it was a serious family affair it made quite the uproar."
"I-I’m sorry for starting up such a commotion."
"What was that about anyway? When I tried to leave it as it was you went and *begged on the ground. In a situation like that, there was no way I could refuse."
"I… I know it was a pretty crazy thing to do. I can barely even remember doing it myself. I must’ve embarrassed you…and for that I’m really sorry."
It was then, the smile disappeared from Suba-nii’s face.
"…No. It’s not that."
His tone of voice changed.
"I was glad. After all, I also wanted to spend Christmas together."
"…I see."
"Even so, I couldn’t think of anything I could do."
Subaru directs his eyes to the paper bag from a little while ago.
"However, ever since I became a pro player, I couldn’t do things half-heartedly. It’s still sporting season, so I have to continue with Basketball as usual."
Suba-nii’s voice grew a bit stronger.
"I was certain she understood that as well."
"I’m sure she understands. That’s probably why she kept quiet about it."
"You’re right…although, I probably should’ve considered it better."
Suba-nii’s voice fills with regret.
"How could I let this happen?"
"You shouldn’t blame yourself, Suba-nii. Even I can’t begin to understand how hard it must be to live so far apart from each other."
"I could have contacted her by telephone or mail. I didn’t even understand that. She’s always putting others before herself. I should have been more wary of it."
Suba-nii’s shoulders slightly dropped.
"It’s no use. Even if we’re dating I…"
"Suba-nii…"
I wanted to say something to cheer him up but…I couldn’t find the right words.
"Even so, it’s not fine as it is."
Is what he said.
"When I return to Tokyo, I want to convey it all. I want to tell her not to be so anxious about me. It may be insensible but, if she’s worrying about me, I want her to tell me without holding anything back."
"Yeah, I think that’s fine. I think it’ll become easier for her to talk about it too."
"Even if I don’t say it, its probably easy to guess but…to be honest…."
Suba-nii gives a wry smile.
"…I really am bad at this. Love and all that."
Suba-nii turned towards me.
"Before this, I was scolded quite a bit by her."
"Really?"
"It was when I was still a student. When I got the invitation from Delight Stars, I didn’t think I could go out with her and become a professional player. I didn’t know what to do."
"I had no idea."
However, at that time she said, “Are you fine with giving up basketball and me?”
"Huh?"
I heard it unintentionally.
"Suba-nii, before all that, had you already told her your feelings?"
"That’s right." Suba-nii nods.
"However, I didn’t get an answer. Not a yes or no."
She told me that she wanted time.
"That sounds…pretty rough."
Even if I liked basketball, to devote myself to it while waiting for an answer…I don’t think I could do that.
If it were me, I would hardly be able to concentrate on other things.
"You think so?"
Suba-nii had said otherwise.
"I felt I made a breakthrough with just a single phrase."
"Really?"
"At the very least, she said she’d give it some thought."
A smile appeared on Suba-nii’s face.
"Besides even if I went to Miyazaki, she told me the distance didn’t matter. If she’d go as far to say something like that to me, its not like I had any other choice but to wait, right?"
"Yeah, but…"
I started to speak.
"Then, you must’ve known about the rest of our brothers."
Yes, I was also aware of it.
"If that’s the case, then weren’t you troubled by it? Not to mention you had to wait for an answer, but still play basketball."
"I had no choice but to do that."
Suba-nii said so clearly.
"I cared about her but when I kept failing at basketball I would only embarrass myself further."
"Suba-nii…"
"So many times."
Suba-nii laughs shyly.
"I couldn’t concentrate on basketball at all. And because of that, I made so many mistakes. But it was for that reason I swore to myself that I wouldn’t embarrass myself in front of her any longer. None of that has changed since I met her."
Suba-nii smiled.
"So it was possible to put forth all my efforts into basketball.
That’s why, I believe it was thanks to her I was able to become a professional player in the first place.”
"….."
Before I even realized it, I wasn’t able to say anything.
While I consider Suba-nii to be really amazing, I can’t help but feel a sense of defeat knock me down and spread throughout my heart.
In that situation he was able to devote himself to basketball and even wait for her answer. I thought his feelings would have been different.
(…I’m no match for him)
No matter how I look at it, Suba-nii will always be ahead of me.
(If a man like that exists, there’s no way I could ever expect her to ever look at someone like me)
"What’s wrong, Yusuke?"
When noticing, Suba-nii seemed suspicious of the face I was making.
"Ah…well…can I use your shower?"
Huh?
"Uh, what I mean is…a lot happened today. So I was thinking I could probably use a shower right about now."
"Oh, I see."
"I’ll get you a towel. Shall I spread out a futon? Although I only have a blanket."
"It’s fine as it is. Ah, Thank you."
It be best if you also get some rest. Since we’ll be returning to Tokyo tomorrow.
"You’re right. Well, I’ll get to bed early then. Go on ahead."
"Alright, thanks."
I enter the bathroom, hot water splashes on my head.。
It continued for a while, and little by little I found my feelings were starting to clear up.
I washed myself, then returned to my room.
With the light already gone, I face the the futon that was placed on the floor along with a blanket folded on top.
I lay down on it, and put my head on a cushion instead of a pillow.
"Were you able to refresh yourself a bit?"
It was then I heard Subaru’s voice from my bed.
"Yeah."
"That’s good. Well…goodnight, Yusuke."
"Goodnight, Suba-nii…"
After saying so, without realizing it I spoke out.
"Suba-nii, can I ask something?"
"Yeah?"
"What about her made you like her…? enough for you to want to date her?"
"I wonder…"
There was a short pause.
"There are lots of things…No matter when I saw her she was always able to keep me doing my best at everything. That’s when I realized I wanted to be by her side forever."
When I heard those words, I felt my chest become hot.
(That’s right…that’s how it is)
If she is by his side, he can do his best at anything.
She is a woman who can give such a power.
(Suba-nii…It seems I understand you pretty well after all)
"Suba-nii, I give you both my best regards."
To my voice, Suba-nii sits up from his bed.
"No matter what, please keep her happy."
I say so as I stare at the dimly lit face of Suba-nii.
There was silence for a while, then I heard Suba-nii’s voice.
"I know, I will. Thank you, Yusuke…"
I heard the voice of Suba-nii become strong. It was a voice in which I knew I could depend on.
"I will keep her happy no matter what."
The next day, I caught a early plane after settling the business with Suba-nii. In the evening, I returned to Tokyo. Suba-nii was able to spend Christmas with her. And after that, the two of them continued dating happily.
—
(God, you really are mischievious, huh?)
The cherry blossoms began to dance as they scatter around. She walks through it. But she who I saw for the first time approaching this place, is leaving to the other side now.
How is it with such beauty, it is the complete opposite? Is it because I always called out for god’s help? Because of my constant pesters?
(Ah man, there really was a lot of times I did)
I recall so many that my head becomes a mess.
But after a while, I recall her smiling face that I saw just moments ago. And they were all swept away.
'Thank you for everything until now, Yusuke-kun'
When leaving, she said so and smiled.
(Thank you, huh?)
It was the goal of these past 5 years.
(Well, it’s not all that bad. As for myself, I did the best I could.)
If possible, I would have liked to hear something different.
But, what I’ve liked to hear are words for a person more suitable to you.
Unfortunately, that person is not me.
(If I met you years later…would you differ?)
I watch her walk while looking ahead. Little by little, she starts to disappear from my view.
(I wonder if you’ll look back one last time…No)
I take a deep breath.
'I can't think like that. Up until now, I never gave up.' Is what I thought.
It’s like she said, we can always meet each other at the university.
But at that time, I’ll have to meet her with different feelings from before.
As family. And…as a friend.
(That’s right, it’s fine this way.)
I strongly persuade myself.
And at that moment, my vision became blurred.
(Hey, what am I doing…? if I’m seen like this what am I going to do then?!)
I feel the pace of which she’s walking seems to indiscriminately slow.
Unconsciously, I start to think if I should just leave early.
She turns at the corner. At last she finally disappears from my view.
She did not look back from here. (Thank goodness…)
I looked up. The warm spring sunshine was awfully dazzling. I closed my eyes.
“Until this very moment…Thank you.” Tears begin to overflow.
Even as they kept pouring out, I stood in the same place the entire time.
